Why on Earth did you become a Celebrant? (And what even is a celebrant?!)
So I completed my residential training course more than 6 months ago now, and in that time I have taken some wonderful celebrations and met some marvellous people.
Saying that, so far I’ve only really dipped my toes into this self employed life and a big reason for that is colossal imposter syndrome and my crippling fear of failure. I know that most of us will suffer with this at some stage and everyone will have their own way through.
For me, the thing that helps the most with this is telling ABSOLUTELY ANYONE WHO WILL LISTEN what my plans are, so that I end up compelled to make it happen! ✌🏼 (so far, this method got 20 year old me a date with that cutie on the bus, a job at the ‘dream’ corporation, an accidental move to Mexico, a solo South American adventure, a place on the ICPC Celebrant training course etc etc) Some would call it manifestation, but I believe it’s residual shame from a loosely Catholic upbringing coupled with being far too stubborn to go back on my word.
My plan is for this to be an open and honest space, where those who know me can see what’s going on in my professional life, where other celebrants/future celebrants can come and see the good, the bad and the ugly of celebrant life and where potential clients can get a bit of a feel for who I am and whether they think I’m the one for them (I sure do hope so!)
Thanks for coming along on this journey with me!
Let’s start from the beginning. Hospitality is in my blood. Both parents come from hospo and despite pretending for a while that I was going to be a corporate-chic, superstar accountant, the lure of spreading joy en masse in a people facing role was just too strong. (Sure, budgeting is still a big time hobby but what do you do for ‘fun’ if your hobby is your job?)
So, I ended up getting a fantastic job managing coffee shops which basically allowed me to drink coffee for free, be a bit bossy and get paid to make friends! Sounds like a dream and it honestly was, even if I’ve never gotten used to 5+ days a week of 5am alarms. The problem was, most of the time the shops were insanely busy, so the deep and meaningful conversations and human connections got far and few between and then coffee started giving me reflux!
I spent a couple of years wracking my brain and researching ideas for my “next step”. I felt like I wanted to make use of the abundance of empathy coursing through me as well as the gift of the gab and my love of organising (do not read that as “being organised” They are completely different qualities!)
Some of the paths not travelled include:
Buying a double decker bus to create my own portable coffee shop
Becoming a funeral director
Studying to be a therapist
Becoming a wedding planner
Working in an office where I would be chatting to strangers on the phone all day, with a great group of people around me and…shock horror…a steady wage?!
I tried that last one for a little while, and the “chatting to strangers on the phone” was actually “being verbally abused by the ‘elite’ down the phone”. Perhaps not.
I have no idea what exactly it was that brought me to the lightbulb moment I had in a beer garden last May, when I was playing designated driver for my girlfriend’s work leaving drinks, but it truly was like a lightning bolt - I’ve spent my life celebrating every little win, I was born to help others celebrate!
I spent the next few months researching what being a Celebrant really meant, how to become one and which organisation to train with before taking the plunge.
There are scores of training schools around so I whittled them down based on things like their offering, their apparent target audience, price and dates of the courses, quality of their website etc, I finally picked one and booked myself a spot a couple of months down the line- a week long residential in the Yorkshire Dales. Stunning.
By the time I arrived, my good old friend Imposter Syndrome had convinced me that I’d be crap, would hate the course and come away back at square one.
Thankfully, that all changed pretty quickly and I left that week absolutely buzzing to start on this journey.
Fun Fact about my course- Our class had 16 people in from all over the country. One of those people happened to be my old Headmaster from secondary school/6th Form who had just retired. How bizarre. What was even more bizarre was that he wasn’t the only classmate I recognised- another classmate was very familiar on that first evening and eventually we worked out that she had been into one of the coffee shops I’d managed in West London a handful of times, despite living in the West Country! SMALL WORLD.
So here I am. Embarking on a path with real purpose. As a Celebrant, it’s my job to create meaningful and personal ceremonies to celebrate life, in all of it’s forms, through all of the milestones. It’s a privilege to guide people through life’s big moments.
I get to have deeply personal conversations with people who are grieving about the life and tribulations of someone very special to them. They will laugh and cry with me through good memories and bad and they help me create the send off that best fits them and their loved one.
I get to hear a couple talk about how they met, why they work so well together, their goals for the future and what they love about each other. Together we get to weave that into a heartwarming ceremony that reflects their beliefs, backgrounds and encompasses all the love that surrounds them. While we talk, they snatch looks at each other that show you exactly why they’re getting married.
I get to hang out with brand new tiny humans and their families, and witness all the love that they’re going to be surrounded by grown up and be part of introducing the littl’un into the world.
It truly is magical being invited into people’s lives and being entrusted with telling their stories. The beauty of being a Civil Celebrant is that there are no rules. We can incorporate any beliefs or cultural aspects that you desire into your day or of course, none at all. There are tonnes of other types of ceremony that I hope to one day get to work on, such as coming out ceremonies, renaming ceremonies (this could be due to a gender transition or divorce for example), vow renewals, adoption ceremonies to name but a few!
Thanks for reading this far! Please do let me know if you have any questions about what a Celebrant can and can’t do or drop me a line at the email below if you have an occasion that you would like me to help you celebrate!